She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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