Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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