I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
