He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
two words: eviction party
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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