...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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