How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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