but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
