One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
