Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
