If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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