Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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