Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize
