i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
