Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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