Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
