i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
