You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
