You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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