I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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