dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Randomize
