there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Randomize
