There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
