what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize