So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize