Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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