his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
