i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
