I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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