So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Hippo gnu deer
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Randomize
