Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
