I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I deserve this hangover.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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