I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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