I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
