Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
