I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
