I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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