dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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