I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
