What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
