..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
He shit in the fireplace
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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