I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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