my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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