brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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