Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize