Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize