we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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