i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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