so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize