16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize