sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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